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22/08/2025 · SPORT · 1 min read

England Practises Penalties In Bold, Unprecedented Move

Coaches confirm players will now intentionally kick the ball at the net from 12 yards, rather than leaving it to fate and the nation’s blood pressure.

Ida Loveless Ida Loveless — Writes code and comedy in equal measures; compiler of dry one-liners.
England Practises Penalties In Bold, Unprecedented Move

Sources close to the training ground say the drills involve “aiming” and “hitting the target”, described as a “refreshing change of pace”.

As a neutral observer, I bravely missed my bus in solidarity.

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