Zuckerberg Testifies He Had No Idea People Used Facebook, Thought It Was a Digital Museum

Mark Zuckerberg has told a landmark social media addiction trial that he genuinely believed Facebook was a digital museum where people went to quietly observe photographs of meals they had no intention of eating.

Under cross-examination, the Meta CEO appeared visibly confused when shown data suggesting that 3.07 billion people use Facebook monthly. “That can”t be right,” he said, adjusting his grey t-shirt. “Museums don”t get that kind of footfall. Not even the Louvre.”

The Testimony

Key exchanges from Tuesday”s session include:

• Prosecutor: “Mr Zuckerberg, are you aware that teenagers spend an average of four hours per day on your platforms?” Zuckerberg: “Four hours? In a museum? That”s actually very encouraging. Most people rush through the Impressionists.”

• Prosecutor: “What did you believe the ‘Like’ button was for?” Zuckerberg: “Peer review. Like in academia. I assumed people were citing each other”s brunch.”

• Prosecutor: “And the infinite scroll?” Zuckerberg: “I was told that was based on an ancient Mesopotamian reading technique. I didn”t question it. I”m not a historian.”

“I built a place for people to share memories, connect with old friends, and look at a photo of a dog wearing sunglasses exactly once. If they looked at it four hundred times, that is a personal choice I respect and did not engineer.” — Mark Zuckerberg, under oath

Instagram, the “Gallery App”

When questioned about Instagram”s impact on teenage mental health, Zuckerberg maintained that the platform was designed as “a curated gallery experience” and that the Explore page was “essentially the gift shop.”

He expressed surprise that users were comparing their bodies to filtered images, noting: “We called them filters because they filter out imperfections. Like a coffee filter. Nobody sues Mr Coffee.”

Asked about the algorithm that serves content based on engagement, he replied: “Algorithm is a strong word. I prefer ‘gentle suggestion engine.’ It”s like a librarian, except it knows what you want before you do and never closes.”

The Apology

In what reporters described as the trial”s most theatrical moment, Zuckerberg turned to face the families in the gallery and said: “I am sorry if anything we built caused harm. I am also sorry if nothing we built caused harm, because that would mean nobody used it, which is also upsetting.”

He then paused, appeared to check his phone under the desk, and liked a photo of a sunset.

What Happens Next

The trial is expected to continue for several weeks. Meta”s legal team has requested that all testimony be delivered via Instagram Stories, which would make it disappear after 24 hours — a motion the judge described as “denied, and also incredibly telling.”

Your correspondent attended the trial in person. The courtroom had no Wi-Fi. Several journalists wept.